As in every field, I'm sure there are acronyms and lingo specific to that career. Cops and doctors have their own lingo. Lawyers do too. In some sense you need a little background knowledge to decipher what someone might be saying. Teachers have their colloquialisms too, but sometimes we teachers teeter on the edge of CHEEZ-E. In case you'd like to sneak into the nearest teachers' lounge, here's a list of the most compelling catch phrases or "buzz words" that today's SoCal teachers are using.
1. "PIGGYBACK": This official sounding word is quite often used in faculty meetings and teacher conferences. Whenever you would like to add a thought to a previous stated idea, you use this word. Use it and earn major brownie points with your comatose staff because it shows: 1.) that you're listening and following along, AND 2.) it validates your colleague's idea. (Because, you know, Mr. G has such cutting edge ideas.)
Example: "I would like to 'piggyback' (flash quotation marks with your fingers) on what Sarah said about recycling egg cartons......."
2. "SPRINGBOARD": Another dorky term. Let's say a teacher wants to teach a lesson on The Egyptians; she'll show off by using this word because it shows she used forethought in her lesson planning.
Example: Said teacher might say the following, "As a springboard activity to the ancient Egyptians, I'm going to bring in my mummified cat......"
3. "KNUCKLEHEAD": Teachers are so succinct and to the point sometimes. This word is synonymous with "GEL HEAD" or "WATER FOR BRAINS."
Example:"So I was in third period (sigh), and Keith (roll eyes) decides to sharpen his pencil in the MIDDLE OF CLASS....WHILE I WAS TEACHING.....he's such a 'knucklehead!'"
And if this teacher lingo has got you gagging, try reading about the "strategies" we use in class to quiet our kids. You know, kids aren't supposed to be yelled at, tied down or taped down to their seats. You know, kids are people too, and we're supposed to employ the following peaceful strategies. They're based on psychological studies, and stuff.
1. STRATEGY #1: Flicking the classroom lights on and off.
Whenever your class is getting rowdy or hopped up, simply walk over to the light switch and quickly flick the lights on and off. LIKE REAL FAST. This low-stress strategy will get your kids' attention lightning fast, and soon enough, they'll be sitting at their desks with their hands folded, prayer style.
Insider Viewpoint This is the dumbest strategy. EVER. Your students will think you're a FREAK.
2. STRATEGY #2: Making the "shhhh" sign with one hand while raising the other hand high. When you'd like to get your students' attention, simply make a "shhhh" sign w/ your index finger, and raise your other hand high in the air. The first student who sees you doing this must mimic your actions....then the second student follows suit....and so on and so on. Before you know it, all kids are copying you, and best of all, they're quiet (because the universal "shhh" sign is so effective)!
Insider's Viewpoint: Um, after the kids are all quiet, encourage them to start waving their raised hands while singing Kumbaya. Try it, you'll like it!
3. STRATEGY #3: Using peer pressure to get others to do what you want.
Let's say your students are gabbing away incessantly. That is all students except María. Use María as an example of the behavior you're trying to elicit. You might say something like, "Oh, I really like how María is reading quietly....she is doing such a great job......" And because all kids go ga ga over praise, they're going to copy María by reading quietly.
Insider's Viewpoint: Most kids will respond with, "Who the f*ck cares what María's doing!" or "She's a 'SKOOL GURL' (again w/ the flashing finger quotations)....who wants to be like that?" María will be shunned for the rest of the school year, but that's O-K because your class is finally quiet and focused.
As a closure to all this fun, I'd like to leave you with a bit o' enjoyment from my last "in-service" (teacher talk for BORING MEETING). I'm a mentor teacher, and I'm currently going through training on how to be Approachable and Warm ™ to my new teachers. On Friday I received a laminated, two-sided Memory Mat to use for future conversations with newbies. Here's a little bit of the Memory Mat's golden knowledge here and here. Feel free to give me any translations as this teacher talk has got me all confused.
And before I go, do take a peek at my updated linklicious page. I know this page needs work as some links were broken and missing. I think I may have fixed them.