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October 18, 2004



I'm totally cracking up over here. Your post just described every teacher I ever had! You forgot the "smack you hand on the chalkboard" tactic. My sixth grade teacher used to do that ALL the time. Scared the crap out of me!


This post is great, brought a well needed smile to my face!


I think this post hit a little too close to home for me... Have you been observing my classroom recently?


hahahaha....all I could do was compare these similar phrases and tactics to my customers at the bar. "knuckle head" comes up often! And flicking the lights can often be used to calm a drunken crowd! If I used "piggtback", someone would get the wrong idea....


Jes! You cracked me up! Yes, I imagine that "piggyback" could be construed in various forms (most of them X-rated!)


As a Maria equivalent, I can assure you that Strategy #3 spells social death. Of course, not quite as bad as the teacher telling the class to go to Maria when they get stuck on Chemistry problems (which also happened to me), but nearly as bad.


Oh my, you've described most of my school days to a tee. Except, we had a few crazies for teachers (3rd grade, 7th grade) that actually scared the bejeezus out of us all to the point where we never misbehaved...

Those phrases above are a very active part of the coporate giant world too. Always fun to count them and the folks who use them in meetings...sometimes, they replace actual meeting content!


So relieved to know that the teaching world isn't the only place where wacky terms are used.

And if you and I ever worked together, we could play so many fun games. We actually make bets before meetings (yes, money is involved) to see who says "piggyback" the most. It passes time much quicker, and elicits many a giggle!!! Actually a teacher (I'll refer to her as Ms. Malaproprism), tends to get things mixed up a bit....."I'd like to piggybank....."


wait.. what about the "drop a big heavy book very suddenly and scare the crap out of everybody to get them to shut up" tactic?

or did i just have some really sadistic teachers?


I loved this. So funny, and sad, and true.


OMG!! I was laughing out loud by the time I got the the flickering of the lights off and on!! Andrew's Kindergarten teacher did all 4 of the strategies that you listed. That is amazing, I never thought of it as though they actually "teach" you this stuff! ha!


Hey, what about this? It's not what teachers say, exactly, but it's something I hate nonetheless. "Caught you doing something good!" Usually teachers are catching students doing something wrong and punishing them, so wouldn't it be funny (wink, wink) if we gave out little reward certificates when a student was JUST BEING GOOD?? It's just do damn cute! Turning in homework on time? Caught you doing something good! Cleaning up trash from the floor? Caught you doing something good!

The whole thing turns my stomach.

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